A Book that Applies to All Marriages?

If you follow TheThrivingSelf on Facebook, you have already heard the incredible news- I was chosen to be a part of the Launch Team for Jackie Bledsoe’s new book, The Seven Rings of Marriage: Your Model for a Lasting and Fulfilling Marriage. This means I had the opportunity to begin reading it before it was released, in order to give my blog’s readers an honest review of what I thought. Today is the day that I share those thoughts with you! (Note: this post contains affiliate links. This helps my blog at no cost to you. Find out more here.)

 

The Seven Rings of Marriage is a book full of universal truths about a marriage relationship from acclaimed blogger and speaker, Jackie Bledsoe. The main premise of the book is that in marriages, we go through certain stages or “rings.” Not everyone goes through these in the same way, but the 7 RINGS listed in this book are:

  1. Engagement RING
  2. Wedding RING
  3. DiscoveRING
  4. PerseveRING
  5. RestoRING
  6. ProspeRING
  7. MentoRING

In exploring each of these stages, the author speaks candidly about his own struggles and successes in marriage, which makes for a refreshing read. He is also open about the importance of his faith in his marriage, which I agree is a crucial foundation for any marriage to become the best it can be.

The ideas presented in this book are both simplistic and powerful if put into action. I have seen them work in  my own marriage and in the marriages of people close to me. Here are some of the things that stuck out to me from the book:

  • When it comes to being one with your spouse, it should include “your goals, your planning, your money, your stuff, your bodies, and even your passwords” -p. 63. When I see people in therapy, this issue comes up a lot. If you don’t buy into the idea that two are truly becoming one in a marriage, and you hang onto some things as just your own, it’s almost always a recipe for disaster.
  • This quote: “The only person you can control in this entire world is yourself. Start there. Instead of trying to change your spouse, work on yourself.” -p. 80. Nothing else really needs to be said here. This idea is absolutely true.
  • In this book, the idea of “winning” an argument is presented. In fact, Bledsoe suggests that we try to win arguments with our spouse! The twist here is what exactly it means to “win” an argument. Instead of thinking that having the last word, coming out on top, or getting your way is “winning,” consider his version. His version of winning is coming out of the argument with appreciation and love on both sides. That’s an idea I can get behind!
  • The emphasis this book places on dating after marriage is great. People wonder why their relationships change once they get married, and not dating your spouse is often the answer.
  • He presents the idea of “domestic sexy.” Guys, if you want to know how to woo your woman, read Chapter Nine!
  • The emphasis is on what really matters. “If your hope is in your husband or your wife, then your hope will fail” -p. 175. In other words, placing your hope in the Author of Hope, Jesus Christ, is the only sure bet. Your spouse will let you down, guaranteed.
  • Lastly, his view of the importance of marriage is right on track with my views and with the reasons I got into counseling in the first place: “When marriages break, families break, and eventually it trickles down into every area of society” -p 193.

My overall take on the book is this: Although it did not present any groundbreaking idea, no groundbreaking ideas are really needed. This book presented the honest, candid, real principles which help to strengthen a marriage, regardless of what stage of marriage you’re in. I think it’s a good read for anyone, whether newly engaged or married for 40 years.

 

You can get this book on Amazon by clicking here!

And I’d like to give a special thanks to Jackie Bledsoe for allowing me to read the book before its release in order to share my thoughts with all of you!

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